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Apollo » Victor W. Fitzgerald, pseud. J. Gatsby ([info]_apollo) wrote in [info]greek_swim,
@ 2009-10-17 00:11:00


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Entry tags:apollo, complete, hebe

Apollo/Victor and Hebe/Emberlynn
Who: Hebe/Emberlynn and Apollo/Victor
What: A dinner date, wherein Apollo tells her who she really is, and she tells him something he would rather not have heard. Angsty.
Where: First, at the Agora, then at Varoulko
When: 6:30PM (dinner's at 8:00PM)
Rating: TBD
Status: Complete


It had been the heart of ancient Athens. He could see it come alive before his eyes, like he had traveled across time, the place transforming before him. People had gathered there to buy and sell things, and to talk of politics, business, events, philosophy, trying to discern the heart of the universe, of the divine. The mortalized Apollo smirked at the thought. It had been the place where ancient Greek democracy first came to life, the center of the Athenian government, where a drainage system, fountains, and -- yes -- a temple to the gods had been built. Another smirk graced Phoebus' lips.

Looking around, he could see where the buildings were added, practically as they were added, then he could see the temples rising up, one constructed for Hephaestus, one for Zeus, and one, for the sun-god himself. He went from the ruined Altar of the Twelve Gods, past the Stoa of Zeus, to the Temple of Apollo Patroos. He could remember like it was yesterday...

And why could he not remember more? It was there. It had to be! What was that gap -- how did they end up in that darkness below? How had they ended up here? And, perhaps most importantly, how could they get back? They had to get back...

Then, he thought of her. He didn't want to let her go, didn't want to fathom the thought of having to give her back. Not to that half-god! She deserved better! And, well, he thought he was better. Not to be cocky or anything. It was just the truth.

The truth. How could he tell her the truth? What would she think? How would she react? But he had to tell her. She had to know. And then, he would know if she wanted him, really wanted him.

He checked his phone, looking at the time, wondering where she might be, whether she might already know, how this was all going to turn out.


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[info]hebe
2009-10-17 10:24 pm UTC (link)
Emberlynn was a lot of things: she was the type of girl who obsessed over what she ate (Hello, actress!), she was the type of girl who scrutinized clothing, she was the type of girl who spent hours on her hair and make up in the morning and put on layer after layer of creams and moisturizers at night, she was the type of girl who freaked out when she started to notice fine lines appear on her face (she was only 23 for Gods-sake!), she was many girl stereotypes not one of them had ever been that she got flustered over a man.

And yet here she was, doing just that. She had changed no less then 5 times before she settled on a dark pair of skinny jeans that she tucked into a knee high black leather boots. On her top she wore a beautiful black and pale blue damask corset with a open white button up shirt over it. With a final look in the mirror to make sure she make up and hair where perfection she all but ran out of the hotel down to her cab that had been waiting for the last 30 minuets. She was sooooo late!

Amazingly cabbies can be bought off with a little extra cash, and she arrived at the location only 10 or so minuets late. She ran a hand through her glossy curls one last time before looking around for Victor, hoping that the butterflies that had settled in her stomach would soon go away. She was so nervous and excited she might just throw up. Which she was sure would win her major points with Victor.

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[info]_apollo
2009-10-18 02:17 am UTC (link)
Alright, so she was late. He waited. Two minutes gone by. Alright, his time could be off... He tried to keep himself occupied, walking around the ruins of the temple. Hey, he could use the time to figure out just what it was that he was going to tell her. Because he hadn't had enough time to do that already.

Five minutes. Seven minutes. Nine minutes. Ten minutes.

He called her, and waited as the phone rung -- after all, he wanted to make sure she knew where it was. Yes, that was it, he tried to assure himself. He ran a hand through his hair, straightening out the white and blue striped button-up he'd worn, which he thought went rather well with his beige chinos. Yes, he, too, had spent a while making sure he looked alright before walking out the door (how many times had he done and re-done his hair?), and, in the end, had decided that, as a god, things were much simpler.

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[info]hebe
2009-10-18 04:09 am UTC (link)
Emberlynn’s pocket buzzed and Kelly Clarkson sang heartily from her pocket. “Shit.” She fumbled trying to remove the phone from her pocket. Note to self, do not put phone in the pocket of skin tight jeans. she thought dully as she was finally able to remove the small device. “Hello! Uh sorry! I know I’m late.” She spilled into the receiver “but I’m here now, where are you?” she asked and then a moment later she didn’t need to. Because she saw him.

She couldn’t help but be awed by him, something about him just radiated light and music and beauty. She could not help but swoon a little bit, ok a lot, at the sight of him. “Oh, I see you.” She was somehow able to half mumble into the phone, half of her worried she had not said actually words at all.

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[info]_apollo
2009-10-18 04:16 am UTC (link)
And he saw her. Ah, the sound of her voice. The sight of her. He stood there for a moment, just looking, watching her, admiring her from where he was standing. Then, he started walking to her. "See you, too," he said, as he put the phone away, a smile spreading across his face.

She was brilliant. Beautiful. Youthful. A true princess in all her glory. Now that he knew, he couldn't imagine how he hadn't realized it before.

He could see her again. The Agora came to life around her, ruins no longer crumbled at the hands of time. The columns sprung up, the temples became whole, the place was alive again. And she outshone everything. The skinny jeans and corset were replaced by a chiton and himation of similar hues, the boots replaced with sandals, but she was the same -- just as striking and timeless as he remembered her.

His smile broadened. "Hey. You look really beautiful," he said.

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[info]hebe
2009-10-18 04:26 am UTC (link)
Emberlynn smiled tucking her phone away. She all but ran to him, she could not help it she needed to be with him. For the young actress the place was lost on her, all that mattered was him and the uncontrollable feeling that she was finally getting what she had yearned for so long. She threw her arms around him when she reached him, delighting in his warmth.

Her face blushed slightly at his comment. “Thank you. You don’t look so bad yourself cowboy.” She said with a warm smile.

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[info]_apollo
2009-10-18 04:51 am UTC (link)
He grinned, watching her blush. Styx, she was beautiful. And that was blasphemous. Styx would not be pleased with him.

"Thanks." He wrapped his arms around her, kissing her. "There's something I have to tell you," he said, trying to focus, trying not to get wrapped up in her, in the visions, in the things he was feeling around her, in the things he wanted to do with her.

"And it's going to sound kind of weird at first, but you need to know this, to remember," he said, seriously, pulling back a little to look at her, his sky blue eyes searching her warm brown ones.

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[info]hebe
2009-10-18 05:06 am UTC (link)
Emberlynn blinked, her brows knitting together. “Ok…” she said slowly “are you going to tell me you used to be a woman?” she asked confused. “because I think I can get past that.” Because really she did not know what to expect, because heaven knew she had not expected him to have to tell her something. There was something about looking at old things and then dinner…. Or maybe not dinner depending on how naughty they wanted to be.

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[info]_apollo
2009-10-18 05:15 am UTC (link)
He shook his head, a chuckle escaping him at her words. "Really?" he asked. No, no! He was getting distracted again. "I mean, no. That's not what it is, but it makes me happy that you think you could get past that," he said, chuckling again. He paused, his look serious once more.

"I used to be-- and you used to be-- more than we are now," he said. Damn it, he was better with words than that. "What I mean is, the dreams, the visions -- all of it is real. All of it happened. It was a long time ago, but all of it really happened."

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[info]hebe
2009-10-18 07:57 am UTC (link)
Emberlynn’s attempt to be funny was lost. All that was left where Victors last words. “W-what?” she asked pushing away from him slightly. Looking at him; flashes of her visions, her dreams filling her head. gowns, chalices, baths, horses, orders. It always came back to that; doing someone else’s will not her own. And him, the shinning god, just always just beyond the reach of her finger tips She shook them from her mind. “What?” she asked again, this time with more purpose in her voice. She tried to smile at him, tried to play it off like she didn’t know what his words meant.

But deep inside her chest, she knew, how could she have not known? But to acknowledge that, it would mean to give up her freedom. The one thing she had always yearned for the most over the years.

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[info]_apollo
2009-10-19 01:59 am UTC (link)
He searched her eyes with his, a soft smile on his lips as he looked at her, thinking. "I remember the first time I saw you, we all quarreled over who would honor you with the most beautiful gift. Athena brought you toys of cunning workmanship shrewdly carved, and many came from the guardian of the Apian Isthmos, Poseidon, toys more precious than gold. Hephaestus brought forth incredible things from his glowing furnaces. We all, in amicable rivalry vied with one another in offering gifts. And me -- I tried my skillful art, music. I remember it like it was yesterday," he said. "Hebe. Juventas. Princess of the Gods."

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[info]hebe
2009-10-19 02:45 am UTC (link)
All girls when growing up dreamed of being princess or being goddesses or even queens. Little Emberlynn never wanted such things; she wanted to be the prince. She wanted to fight the dragons and rescue the girl (not that she was a lesbian but those fairy tales had always been so black and white) to be the one that went on adventures never the one locked in the tower, she never wanted to be locked up again. So you can fully understand how Victors words crippled her, she gripped his shirt as his words hit her. Words so on target she could not help but knew he was speaking the truth.

Her dark eyes looked up at him pleading “No…. please….” She whispered.

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[info]_apollo
2009-10-19 05:30 am UTC (link)
His hands went over hers, and he squeezed them, what he was hoping would come across as a reassuring action. "I'm sorry... it's true..." he said. "You're Hebe." He looked at her, could see her again, both there, as she was, at that moment, and as she had appeared so long ago. The only difference was the clothing. He sighed.

"And I'm Apollo," he added. "Who used to lean in and whisper in your ear when you would pour the ambrosia," he said. "Do you remember?"

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[info]hebe
2009-10-19 06:55 am UTC (link)
“No.” she said shaking her head “NO!” she pulled away from his grasp “I am not her, she was a broken sad little shade of a girl, and she was nothing, just a pawn to be played.” She recounted her breath becoming ragged “Never able to do or say what she wanted, never able to be free.” her brown eyes where pleading with his blue “She wasn’t even allowed to love who she wanted.” She paused.

“No, I am Emberlynn Leighanne Leicester! I have power, money people falling all over to do what I want them to do not the other way around.” she paused her resolve breaking, her voice cracking “I won’t go back to that… I can’t go back to that, you have to understand that.”

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[info]_apollo
2009-10-19 10:42 pm UTC (link)
"You were never a pawn to me," he said, his deep voice quiet, his eyes looking into hers intently. This was not the sort of reaction he was hoping for, but really, it could have been anticipated. After all, he couldn't genuinely, in his heart, say that he blamed her. And he'd seen what she had written before, when she'd taken the time to look up her own name. He didn't know whether to try to persuade her that it would be best for them to go back to it, or whether it would be better to just suggest they run away and forget the whole mess. Part of him, a very large part, wanted the latter. They could get out of there, start over, live their lives somewhere else, far away, and forget this whole thing ever happened.

But they couldn't. There was no going back.

"Emberlynn--Hebe-- we can't just ignore it," he said. "We can't run away from it," he paused, almost deliberating it for another moment, then shaking his head. "We are who we are. There's no changing that. But just know that you were never, ever a pawn to me, and I always thought you were more than what you've said."

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[info]hebe
2009-10-20 03:41 am UTC (link)
“Oh, Apollo,” She countered bitterness sticking to her words “if only I could see the world as you did.” It was not that she was trying to be mean, but really she doubted the sun god, the favorite, could really understand “It dose not matter how you see me, how much you love me, as her, that’s all I ever was. I was used by my father, I was used by my husband, I was used by my brother to destroy the man I loved.” She paused, her words where not angry or spoken harshly, and that might have been the most tragic part. “No one ever asked how or what I am doing. They could not care less. I’m a looking glass, existing only to reflect their images back to them as they’d like to be seen. Hollow vessels of a girl to be rinsed of my own ambitions, wants, and opinions, just waiting to be filled with the cool, tepid water of gracious compliance.” She curled her arms around her chest.

She had known the moment they had made love that first night, had known the truth of everything, since then she had been hiding from it. She met his warm bright blue eyes “This was my wish; this was my dream come true. This is my chance, and I can’t let you take it from me.” The corners of her eyes pricked painfully with tears that wanted to spill down her face “I love you more then you may ever know, but I can’t go back to that, I’d rather die.”

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[info]_apollo
2009-10-20 04:38 am UTC (link)
He blinked as he looked at her, looking at her eyes, noticing the slight glassiness to them. He shifted, almost uncomfortably -- seeing her like that made him feel terrible. He wanted to make it better, wanted to help, wanted nothing more than to make everything right in the world for her, to see her smile that smile that lit up his world. But he knew what she meant. He remembered the anger that had cursed through him each time he'd seen her wronged. She deserved so much better -- he could give her so much more, if only he had the chance. But he'd never taken that chance, never acted until it was too late, always caught up in something else.

"I care. I've always cared," he said, taking a step close to her. He reached out, cupping her face gently, eyes moving over each beautiful detail of her perfect face. "You're you, no matter what name you go by," he said, "and I love you. Now that I've found you, I don't want to live without you. It doesn't have to be as it was before. It can be different -- we can make it different, this time."

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[info]hebe
2009-10-20 05:00 am UTC (link)
She wanted to believe him, wanted so hard to fall head first into his easy words. But that’s all they where words. How many times had she been promised better? By Zeus, by Ares, by her husband? Countless promises, ever single one of them shattered like glass.

“All I want is you as well.” She said slowly “but I can’t change how things are, I’m a cub-bearer Apollo. A servant even to my own family. I can’t fight them; their pressures are too great for me to hold off. The only thing I can do is hide from them.” She paused “after all this time I deserve to be happy, to have what I want, what I desire.” She paused not longer able to hold the tears back and they fell freely down her face and over his hand “I don’t think I can change anything, and I’m not inclined to believe you can either.” She left off ’because you never did before.’ “Its too big. But I do think I can hide from it, if I had you with me..”

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[info]_apollo
2009-10-21 02:06 am UTC (link)
He wiped the tears away, gently moving his thumb over her cheek. "What do you want to do? You know we won't be able to hide forever," he said, his voice quiet. But she had to hear it -- he had to be honest with her. And Apollo was not much one for hiding, either; he never had been. The whole idea of it made him uneasy, in much the same manner as her crying made him uneasy. It was strange; crying had never fazed him before. "Please don't be this way. We can find a way to make things right," he said, trying to console her.

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[info]hebe
2009-10-21 04:20 am UTC (link)
Emberlynn…Hebe… whoever she was she knew he was right. Not that that knowledge made it any easier. “God…”She mumbled running her hands across her face “I’m such a dumb girl.” She allowed trying to smile. She didn’t mean to cry, hell she didn’t even like crying but most of the time it seemed that it happened anytime she had a lot of emotion, especially anger. And that was counterproductive; no one took you seriously when you just dissolved into tears all the time.

“Ok,” she said slowly “ok….I’ll give it a little time…” she looked down “But if its not different….well, I’m not making any promises.”

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[info]_apollo
2009-10-21 11:11 pm UTC (link)
He shook his head. "No, you're not," he said. "It's completely understandable." He was trying to be as soothing as Apollo was reasonably capable of doing -- it was, by no means, his strongest suit. But he did deserve credit for giving it his utmost effort, on this particular occasion. Watching her attempt to smile made his own lip turn up just slightly. She was so beautiful, breathtaking, especially when she smiled.

"And thank you. Just give it a chance; that's all. No promises, just a chance." He kissed her forehead gently.

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[info]hebe
2009-10-21 11:48 pm UTC (link)
Hebe tilted her head up towards him “Oh, Apollo” she kissed the corner of his upturned mouth “I will, thank you.” She could not help but press her face into his shoulder and took a deep breath trying to collect herself in an instant. She just wanted it to be like this, just her and him forever. Sometimes she wised things could be this simple, why couldn’t they stay this simple. Just a girl and a boy.

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[info]_apollo
2009-10-22 02:14 am UTC (link)
He wrapped his arms around her, trying to be reassuring, wishing he could make everything right in the world, just for her, for the woman with whom he'd been secretly near-obsessed for millennia. One of his hands went into her soft chestnut locks, running his fingers through her hair, trying to be comforting. A soft sigh escaped him, as he thought. He had to make things right for her, couldn't let things go back to the way they used to be. He wanted more for her, would have given her his bow, or the reigns to his chariot, drawn by the fiery horses, if it would make her smile.

"Shh... It's just you and me now. Come on, let's go have dinner and forget the rest of this mess for now," he said. "Right now, it's just the two of us."

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[info]hebe
2009-10-22 03:11 am UTC (link)
All she needed, all she wanted, all she ever wanted, was her hand in his. So in that moment she was perfect, besides the fact that she felt ridiculous. She was here with the man, no God, she had desired more then anything else for as long as she could remember. She should revel in that, now there was no mother or father, no brother or husband just her and him. “Ok, lets go eat.”

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[info]_apollo
2009-10-23 01:44 am UTC (link)
And he would have vehemently disagreed with that notion of ridiculousness, had he the chance. To him, she was anything but ridiculous. She lit up his life, was what fueled him, was like the dawn itself, bringing light after the long darkness. And there was nothing but the two of them then, no one else to worry about, nothing complicated about anything. He pulled away for just a moment as he called a cab to pick them up, then offered her his arm. "Shall we?" he said.

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[info]hebe
2009-10-23 07:52 pm UTC (link)
She slipped her arm into his “We shall.” She beamed up at him. Slipping into the cab when it arrived she rested her head softly on his shoulder thinking “Aigletes,” she started softly, the epitaph falling from her lips like a drop of wine “Have you met anyone else? This has to do worth the journals right? So we are all here?” as much as she had hoped it was only them logic eventually prevailed, after all she was never so luck as to get a gift like that. Especially one without stings attached.

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[info]_apollo
2009-10-23 11:42 pm UTC (link)
He looked at her, and the thought of dishonesty seemed briefly appealing. He didn't, after all, want to upset her, didn't want to complicate matters, or cause any trouble--much as he usually liked to, with her, it was different. He had to tell her, had to be honest.

"I met Artemis. She found me, actually," he said, thoughtfully. "She's been working with the Feds or something like that. Suits her well, I think," he remarked. He paused as they arrived at the restaurant, paying the cab and stepping out, holding the door open and offering her his hand, looking at her. "I also saw your mother. No, we didn't tear each other to shreds. Obviously."

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[info]hebe
2009-10-24 09:46 am UTC (link)
Hebe nodded as he spoke, Artemis’ job did make sense, so did Apollos’. As for herself she felt like she would fit her calling better as a bartender or something, well she did make a mean drink, just not sure what acting had to do with it all. Perhaps it was Hollywood’s obsession with youth that drew her to it… She was snapped out of her thoughts at the mention of her mother.

“My mom?” she asked dumbly, looking up into his sunny face. Hebe actually like her mother, while she was not always the easiest to get along with, or the kindest, or had actually done anything to help her youngest daughter, she had never done anything directly to the youth goddess. And on Olympus that counted for a lot. “How is she?” she asked as they made their way into the restaurant. Hebe didn’t even notice the hostess almost fall over at the sight of her, or the flash of a camera as they sat down at their table.

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[info]_apollo
2009-10-24 06:06 pm UTC (link)
"She looks good," he said, holding out the chair for her to sit before sitting himself. He subtly glanced around, thankful, at least, that they were off in a corner, not in the middle of the restaurant. "Her name is Anthea -- she has apparently done well for herself, if her expensive garb and posh hotel are anything to go by." Their server brought them water, and opened a bottle of wine, pouring it out into two glasses in front of them, and setting down bread while they looked at the menus. Victor thanked him, but waited until he was gone to return to the subject at hand.

"There's going to be a little get together where we try to figure out what happened and why we're all here, in this particular situation -- she'll be there, if you were interested in going. If not, then that's fine, too."

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[info]hebe
2009-10-24 09:27 pm UTC (link)
As the waiter poured their wine it was all Hebe could do not to snatch the bottle out of his hands; that was her job! “I’m glad,” she said pushing herself past the momentary anger and back into the conversation “She deserves some happiness, at least for a little while.” She admitted, she had always hated the way her father treated her mother, almost as much as she hated the way her father treated her. “Maybe,” she said in regards to the meeting not wanting to make her mind up either was at this point her brow knitted together for a moment before she relaxed it a mental chastised about eyebrow wrinkles “What do you remember?”

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[info]_apollo
2009-10-25 02:24 am UTC (link)
He nodded, thinking. "It's up to you," he said, holding up his glass for a toast and taking a sip. "I remember more than I did a few days ago, but it's still muddled. I've tried putting things in some sort of sequence, but there are gaps, and some confusing scenes and feelings," he admitted. "I actually laid out a sort of timeline across the floor of my apartment," he added, with a chuckle. Perhaps his sister had rubbed off on him. "I can remember scenes of you, first time I saw you, the throne room, other scenes on Olympus." He sipped his wine again, looking into the glass, "some issues with Artemis, scenes from the Trojan affair, various conflicts with Ares, and a break. Something like a conflict between him and father, discord among the gods." He sipped more wine, not wanting to add more, not wanting to say there were only a handful left who stood beside the Sky King. And then there was her, standing on the opposite side. It had been more than he could stand -- he lost his will to fight when he saw her.

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[info]hebe
2009-10-25 04:41 am UTC (link)
She toasted his glass sipping her own wine as he spoke images filling her own head. Hands on her, strange hands, hands she did not desire. Yet they where still there, as where the words; Sickly sweet, admiring, loving. Only she knew it was not love, love was not like this. No, she knew love this was not love this was a sick façade. She also knew it was something she would never have. A hand turned her face towards his, lips claming her own hungrily as her clothing was ripped off, she stifled a whimper. The only way she could get through it, to live this life, would be to pretend. She nodded as he spoke and at the mention of her brother the memory slammed down on her hard and fast like a bolder.

He had found her when she was alone, looking back on it later she would realize that she was one of the first people he had come to, save perhaps Eris or Aphrodite, before she had even heard of the uproar at court. And he played on the fact she didn’t know, he had played her “Zeus’ time will be over. I will usurp him. All the wrongs he has done, I will right them.” He had touch her softly, in that way he only ever did with her, she was sure she was the only one who saw this side of him “I know how you have suffered, little Hebe, but if you side with me, if you pledge to not help any who oppose me, and only serve me any my men your sweet ambrosia.” He brought her face closer, meeting her eyes evenly he kissed her softly “When this is all over, I will set you free, give you back your station, your life.” It seemed all too good to be true.

“I swear I will...” she had started

“Swear by Styx.” He command softly “I need you Hebe, you are my ace up my sleeve, I wouldn’t normally ask but this is a troubling time and I need to know, I need your all.”

“I swear by Styx…” and that was the end of it, she would be bound by death to her word. And he had lied to her.

She looked up at Apollo, could she ever explain to him. She had done it for them. And it had all gone terrible wrong. “I only remember the bad.” She said sofly.



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[info]_apollo
2009-10-25 05:04 am UTC (link)
Victor-- no, Apollo watched her, biting back the question that he wanted to ask, instead drinking the wine. Why? Why, why, why? He'd screamed it as he paced around the Olympian palace for days afterward, brooding in a manner uncharacteristic of the sun-god. Phoebus had been deeply wounded. The earlier skirmishes with Ares seemed for naught now. He hadn't realized that she had been with him, as well. He looked around. Only a handful remained. They would be coming soon... What had he to fight for, really?

"I'm sorry," he said, taking another sip, keeping himself from asking, though it was becoming increasingly difficult. "There must be some good," he said, reaching for her hand with his, trying, again, to be comforting, though he himself was growing uncomfortable with the visions and feelings that threatened to envelop him.

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[info]hebe
2009-10-25 05:22 am UTC (link)
She looked up at him, his hand on hers was almost too much the bear, and she did not deserve his kindness. “The only good was you.” She admitted slowly. It nearly killed her when she found out the truth, tore her heart right in two. Her chest actually hurt, she could scarcely breath such was her pain. What had she done? How could she have let this happen? Why was she so trusting and naive?

She searched Apollo face “It all went wrong, “ she began feeling like her heart was going to split all over again, after all how could he still love her? “It wasn’t supposed to be like that…. I….never meant….. I didn’t…” she stumbled over her words trying to express her regret, she took a deep breath to keep the tears at bay “I didn’t know the whole story, I thought I was helping us…he used me ….. Oh Gods…used me against you… He made me swear… there was nothing I could do…”

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[info]_apollo
2009-10-25 05:46 am UTC (link)
The words hit him like a ton of bricks. It was all he could do to close his eyes, and finish off his glass of wine, placing the glass down, but not letting it go. He needed another, really, he did. He was not nearly inebriated enough to be hearing this, and he could feel his blood pressure rise, could feel his heart rate increase. He let out a breath he didn't know he'd been holding, and looked at her, opening his blue eyes and meeting her warm brown ones again. He wanted to yell, wanted to bring down a deadly plague, a shower of arrows, curses, pain. He let go of the glass as he realized it was about to break in his hand. Images swam before him again, took over him -- he relived it all.

"There wasn't a moment that went by, when I was down in the depths of Tartarus that I didn't think of you," he said, his voice low, somewhere between infuriated and languishing. "Seeing you by his side drained from me the very will to fight, stripped me of the desire to continue my existence of wretched immortality, even if I were to have it all." Looking at her, he didn't know why he was speaking that way, why he felt so angry, so betrayed, so hurt -- he wanted to comfort her, but all he could see was her, standing by their brother, just feeling everything sucked from him in that moment. "There's a moment, there's always a moment, 'I can do this, I can give into this, or I can resist it,' and I don't know when your moment was, but I bet you there was one," he said, uncharacteristically dark for the sun-god.

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[info]hebe
2009-10-25 09:39 am UTC (link)
“Please” she pleaded “Don't stop loving me. I can see it draining out of you. It's me, remember?” she grabbed for his hand “Please.” She whispered again “He found me, we talked, he told me beautiful half truths about everything, about how he was going to make everything new again, that he hated to see my suffer so, that he was going to set me free.” She looked at him; every once of her will power was spent on keeping the tears from her eyes “I thought… I thought I was doing the right thing, that after it was all over that we could be together.” She squeezed his hand.

She had tried so hard to sneak down to see him, the war was over and so was her oath, she would bring him ambrosia she would try to explain… but Ares had found her. He had thrown her, had lorded his war toned body over her fragile one. “If you try to see him again, I will tear him apart, cause him to suffer a pain worse then you can imagine! You are mine now Hebe! And I will tank you to remember your place!”

“I was a cupbearer, bound to an oath I took to quickly because of my hatred for Zeus, because of my love for you. There was nothing I could do, there was not a day that went by I did not mourn for you, I didn’t eat, I didn’t drink.” She paused “I couldn’t see you…. He said if I tired that he would destroy you…. And it was only the idea of you, the idea that you where still existing someplace that gave me any will to go on.”

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[info]_apollo
2009-10-26 03:15 am UTC (link)
"He and I hate each other," he said, through narrowed blue eyes. He did not squeeze her hand in his, but neither did he withdraw it. Instead, it just stayed there as he stared at her. "How could you think that there would be any possibility of any semblance of a happy ending by what he was proposing?"

Apollo was a man who made decisions based on his feelings, and his feelings were torn, at the moment, an epic tug-of-war between miserable anguish and acrimonious hostility. "Easy for you to say to me right now. Have you ever been to Tartarus?" he asked. "Do you have any idea what it is like?" his voice was low and it was all he could do to keep it at that level. The emotions he was feeling, that bitter antipathy, that indignant despondency, crept into his tone, one that spoke volumes, so that there was no doubt -- he felt betrayed.

"And it's not about love, Hebe. I love you. But you are a woman as I am a poet. Women and poets are always free with their hearts. Are they not?"

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[info]hebe
2009-10-26 05:18 am UTC (link)
“But he didn’t hate me,” Hebe pointed out “At lest he didn’t used to, and I didn’t think he knew about us, not that there was an us anyway.” She took a deep breath before meeting his gaze evenly, she was no longer the broken meek girl she was on Olympus, Emberlynn had taught her better then that. “But he knew enough to come to me early, you both knew the second Zeus named you his successor that it would come to war, I had not even heard of it yet, yet he came to me and you did not.” Her voice was not accusatory just stating the facts “I didn’t know what the fight was over, I didn’t know it was against you. Do you honestly think I would have signed up if I did? If you honestly think that, if you honestly think I could betray you like that, then you should have killed me when you first saw me today.” She met his sky blue eyes searching for any sign of forgiveness, for any sign of hope she would not have to live this pain again.

But as he mentioned the prison she had to drop her gaze, she could not bear to look into his eyes as he spoke of his time in Tartarus. “I don’t,” she said slowly, softly. She couldn’t even imagine such torment, such pain, even the through of what he had endured now caused bile to rise in her mouth.

“Why isn't love enough?” She asked softly. But even before she asked it she knew the answer, it had never been enough, not for them.

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[info]_apollo
2009-10-26 11:20 pm UTC (link)
"You said us; you said we," he asserted, pouring himself more wine, which, he had decided, he needed in order to continue the conversation. "Usually, you make an inquiry before pledging your allegiance one way or another. But then, I guess, Ares was never good at such things," he said. "Why would I expect any different?" he shook his head as he looked at her. "Fact is, coup d'états aren't commonplace, and Zeus had already survived one attempt," he said. "The probability was not statistically significant." He had finished half the glass.

"I have been there, and I spent every day thinking of you, seeing you there, by his side," he said. "The image is etched in my mind." He drank more wine.

"When we have run our passion's heat, it hither makes its best retreat, because it is the domain of a giggling, fickle, adulterous woman and her impish brood," he added, without a second thought on it.

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[info]hebe
2009-10-27 04:20 am UTC (link)
His words hit her like a slap in the face, like he had reached across the table and backhanded her. She stiffened, biting her lip, she would not cry. Not again. She would save that for her own private torment. Her hands gripping the table cloth, knuckles white, as if she let go she herself might descend into Tartarus herself. And in a way she had already. This, this is what hell was, she was sure of it. To be so close and yet to have a great canyon spread between them and no way to cross over to him. Only to long for what she could not have for eternity.

She looked down at her lap, not longer able to look into those eyes she had dreamed of so many times and see only betrayal and hatred in them. She pushed away from the table not looking up at a loss for words. After all what could she say? “I’m sorry you though so little of me, I’m sorry I acted just as you thought I would,” her voice cracked and she took a second to try to stifle the sob that was creeping up in her chest to little avail “I wish….so many things that if wishes where stones I could build a temple” Her voice cracked again “I’m sorry… it was never supposed to be like this, but apparently my words mean nothing to you.” She pushed herself up form her seat with out looking at him, she couldn’t because she would loose it all. And she did not want to, not now.

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[info]_apollo
2009-10-27 05:28 am UTC (link)
He stared into the glass of wine as he listened, unable to look at her, afraid to look at her because of what he was feeling. That hurt, he'd not felt that hurt in so long. He'd forgotten what it was like to feel that hurt. It was the same hurt he'd felt all those years ago. Years had dulled the pain, but there it was, fresh, like new. In his youth, he never thought he would feel anything worse than his loss at Daphne with that direct hit from Eros' arrow. And yet, he had. He never thought he would feel worse than he did when he saw Hebe, blushing bride to Heracles, a sort of negotiation for peace between his half-god half-brother and his discontent stepmother. And yet, he had. He never thought he would feel worse than when he saw her, standing side-by-side with their warmongering brother. And yet, he had. He was feeling it right now.

Why were the love gods so cruel? He was torn, torn between those emotions that had driven him to brash actions before, but this time they were so different, so intense. It was more than just pride, more than just a game -- this time, it was real, genuine. What was the word that was burning in his heart?

His voice was quiet when he spoke as he saw her, in his periphery, push herself up from her seat, as he heard her. His eyes remained on his glass, staring through it, almost, intently out of focus.

"I'm sorry, too."

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[info]hebe
2009-10-27 08:46 pm UTC (link)
Hebe began to walk away no longer able to bear what was happening. But she stopped, remembering something Emberlynn’s mother told her as a child. She turned just slightly towards him, not looking at him but knowing her words would carry over to him. “I’m sorry Apollo, There is a lot of gray in the world, and unlike you, the rest of us can not live in the light all of the time.” She felt a tear fall down her cheek and it was all she could do to keep her composer long enough to walk out of the restaurant.

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